Favorites List 2.20.20

It's been a while since my last favorites list. So here are a few more finds:

Find out if a brand is ethically produced -- The idea of fast fashion is harder to ignore, no matter how cool that Zara sweater is. It's less and less something I want to support. If you're feeling the same, you can check the integrity of a brand at Good On You. You can also explore ethical brands that you've probably never heard of. On another note, for another way of buying second hand and therefore lower impact, there's The Real Real.
And have you seen the new site that Nordstrom has put up called See You Tomorrow where they sell pre-owned clothing and accessories? I was shocked to see a store of their stature go into second hand. Super cool, though. There's too much crap on this planet.

Daily Pages -- Do you journal? The actual "Daily Pages" practice is originally from the Artist's way, which I have not read, but it claims to help with anxiety. Mental hygiene. Floss out those worries in words. Also, has anyone subscribed to 750 Words? I guess it's just as easy to open a Word doc, and more private. Though, what is privacy anymore? Sometimes I care, and then other times I feel like it's futile to care. How about the guy who is rounding up billions of photos for the government's facial recognition program. Who, also btw, was just hacked and all photos stolen. Who would do this and why? Wait, this is a bullet point on reducing anxiety.

Palihouse Hotel, Santa Monica -- I stayed here recently with my niece and loved it. It was featured in a film by Heidi Swanson, so I figured it had to be good. It was super inviting, the rooms are huge and include kitchens, and it was quiet. Breakfast in the lobby is great; the best blueberry pancakes I have ever had. The chef apparently is a big deal.

Parakeet Cafe -- They are in Little Italy where that comfy shoe store used to be on the corner. They have the best matcha lattes, and wonderful, healthy bowls. I've also had their turmeric latte, too, which was also super tasty. Super cute interior, too. Go!

That's it for now. The new year arrived without a post, so I have now remedied that. More soon...

Swedish Death Cleaning

For the past decade, I've helped my husband's parents with all manner of things. I'm a great daughter-in-law, if I may say so, and love my married-into family. I think with my parents already gone, I have a bit more emotional space than folks who still have their parents, so it's a win-win for everyone involved.

My husband's mother, an avid collector, has amassed a layered and rich collection of objects, all displayed in lovely ways. She has been super creative her entire life, mostly in the domestic arts, and her work has brought the family much joy. Every holiday involved a dinner with spectacular centerpieces. We're talking Easter, 4th of July, St. Patty's Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Valentine's Day, Halloween, Robert Burns supper, and everyone's birthday, celebrations of promotions, dinners to nurse those not feeling well, and more -- I'm sure I'm missing something.

Over her lifetime, she taught classes in teddy bear making, how to do general embroidery, and also Shisha embroidery. Much of her work is now with many of us; my husband has three brothers. She is still with us, though not living in the home I'm describing - it's round the clock care time. It's hard to grasp that she is not the ruler of her little castle any longer, but time stops for no woman.

But back to this topic of cleaning, and Mom's vast collection. Where to begin? She collected teddy bears, many of them vintage Steiff, and by "collect" I mean hundreds. Some bears are so small they fit in your palm. There's also miniature furniture, to go in the beautiful doll houses. Sets and sets of china and glasses, and embroidery supplies -- so much thread you can't imagine, coupled with so many scissors. As a calligraphy artist, she had pens galore in a rainbow of colors, all stored in English crocks. The teddy bears have complete wardrobes, including glasses and passports and tiny notebooks and cutlery of their own, with table cloths and luggage it all fits into. There are chocolate molds, and handmade decor for every holiday, and Pendleton blankets in so many patterns, and a miniature pen collection, and Limoges boxes, and garden rabbits that hold succulents, and a dozen military macaws hanging along the backyard fence keeping watch. There are dainty handkerchiefs and lace doilies, carefully stored with tissue. There are scores of cookbooks and herb books and art books. She loves Brighton handbags and Indian jewelry. She loves Laura Ashley and Mary Engelbreit and Martha Stewart and McKenzie-Childs. She always had an ikebana arrangement on display when you came in the front door, and she took classes at the Athenaem to get even better at it; though she was a natural in floral arrangement. She and her husband held years and years of mystery dinner theaters with a small group of friends, who all traveled to London for more mystery dinnering, with some of the group still faithful friends to this day. What a rich life. What a beautiful life, full of all the things she loved. Oh, and Dad collects fountain pens. If you're getting a picture of a packed house, albeit a beautifully arranged one, you are getting the right idea.

For the last many years, during our daily call to Mom we'd ask what's going on?, and the answer among other things was: "oh, clearing things out. Sorting things. Getting rid of things." From where I sit today, in the midst of these collections and trying to figure destinations for everything, it's obvious that maybe things were moved from here to there, but out the door they did not go!

So recently, the topic of Swedish Death Cleaning has emerged, and I am fascinated by it along with all things minimalism, which for me includes Marie Kondo and The Minimalists and Live Planted and The Mustards and many others trying to live with less clutter and less work, so they can have more time, more experiences, and more life. "Things" own us they say, and they do, because they require us to manage them, sort them, pay rent on them, keep them clean and organized -- all things that cost us something whether time or money or mind space.

At this point in my life, I'm not a good, or even okay, minimalism example, though my goal is to whittle it down to the essentials. May each essential be the most beautiful essential, but by god let there be few of them. Without children, who will have to deal with this if I leave a mess behind? One of my nieces? Our only nephew? My husband, if I go first? A friend? I don't want that for anyone.

I just ordered The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning for a friend and me; we talk almost daily and lately our chatter has been on this topic, and it's pertinent because I am in the throes of cleaning out said collection above. It's been real motivation to not leave my "collection" to anyone. For one reason, it's draining work, full of memories that you can't help but relive. I feel like each item deserves its honoring, as its fate is determined.

So to all those with hoards, maybe get this book, too, and do your döstädning before someone else has to do it for you. 

Favorites List - October

(c) Heidi Swanson

One of my favorite 'Favorites Lists' is published by Heidi Swanson, an LA-based cookbook author, occasional designer, shop owner and creator of 101 Cookbooks. Here are all her favorites lists; literally months worth of exploring. Years?
Lately I've enjoyed:

Alison Roman's chickpea stew - So, I made it the other night and it is delicious. I did not add the greens, but I covered it with avocado and tons of cilantro. It was even better the next day. One tip: when she says salt and pepper it three times, I forget the stages, do that.  

The Slow Home podcast - This couple has great guests and I love the cadence of their talks. Brooke McAlary and her husband Ben have a really sweet, nurturing and non-interrupting communication style. Just listened to the interview with Joshua Becker, one of the first minimalists I learned about. It was Episode 7; I have started at the beginning of their 3 seasons of podcasts, so working my way through.

This makeup tutorial by Liv Tyler - not only because her voice lulls me to sleep, but because she goes through such an interesting array of serums and potions; French, Korean, clean beauty and otherwise. She clearly has, or makes, the luxury of time. Funnily, she gets her beauty tips from her Dad. 

End of day de-cluttering. A favorite activity lately: I've been ending the workday with a bag-fill of items for donation or throwing out. It could be just 5 small items, but I always find something. I'm going through files and purging paper, collecting things that I know certain people would like, etc. With the end of the remodel in sight, I'm looking forward to doing this even more intentionally. The Courtney Carver workshop is a great motivator. 

And with that, happy weekend all.

Where did my interest in Minimalism begin?

Helen and Scott Nearing

I’m always learning as much as I can about simple living. It appeals in so many ways. I’m even taking a course right now called Soulful Simplicity. Here’s a link to the course, which is closed now but reopens in 2020.  It was created by Courtney Carver, the inventor of Project 333; also worth a Google.

But today I was wondering where this fascination began. Sure, I got on board with TheMinimalists guys early on and probably listened to 100 or so of their podcasts. I still dip in occasionally for a listen. But it really started with Scott and Helen Nearing, in my mind, the OGs of simple living. Their foundation website is here.  Scott and Helen were homesteaders, and I mean hardcore: root cellars, canning, popcorn for dinner, cold winters, simple Thoreau-style living quarters. Serious about it. And now as I look back, this is where the early concepts of minimalism entered my mind. I was younger when I read their books, and it appealed to me because I had the strength to have maybe pulled it off. Finding a willing partner, now that’s another story. But at my age now it sounds like a cold winter I’d never make it out alive from. Heavens to Betsy, turn on that heater!

I don’t know where this path leads, but it resonates so deeply with me. And with that, good night and sweet dreams to all.

Build in buffers

Last week, I went to lunch at a favorite spot, got a veggie sandwich on olive oil bread and sat in my car parked in the shade in front of a large green plot of grass. Trees swaying, cool breeze and the dulcet tones of one of my fave podcasts: The Slow Home Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-slow-home-podcast-with-brooke-mcalary/id985005895
It's run by a couple who shares interesting updates and advice on living slower in a fast paced world; they also host guests. I loved a concept they shared about building buffers into your days. Little breaks from the busy life agenda - always a good thing.
In other news, we recently saw Downton Abbey and Ad Astra. Both great.
Better still, I'm enrolled in Courney Carver's Soulful Simplicity course based on her book https://bemorewithless.com/soulful-simplicity/ and it's very helpful. If you have any desire to simplify your life, check her out.

Day interrupted: Dies intermissus

How many times a day are you notified and alerted? Phone banners, texts, incoming emails, news feeds. So much click bait vying for our attention, and so many tragic headlines. Do you drop it all and swim into the chaotic flow? Or choose  something non-electric like nature. Supposedly just breathing in a forest that has fern growing strengths your microbial makeup, because ferns are some of the most prehistoric plants out there and they offer healthy soil microbes that we need. So go snort some fern air, and do it today.

To change your alert functions: go to Settings, then Notifications (on an iPhone,) and turn off as many notifications as possible. Silence the demons of solace. 💗

Slowing down

Nearly 10 days of sniffling, sneezing, aching, and whining. Cap that off with my phone being stolen this Sunday. I joked when my husband came home for lunch the first day I was "existing" without my phone:

Him, walking through door: Hi, how's it going? Me: Oh my god, someone found me! I feel like a Chilean miner hearing the first taps from rescuers.

Today is day two of the phoneless situation, and I have a new practice brewing. While I have the options of checking my social sites via desktop, I'm finding myself not doing that. In my new phoneless world, no one can call me. I'm not getting texts. I can't send any texts. I feel lighter. If you want me, it's email or you could write me a letter.

Slowing down brings the little things into focus. Give you time to read about the Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life by Hecktor Garcia and Francesc Miralles.

New year, new crack at Minimalism

Photo credit: http://daniebester.co.za/

I may have gone too far when I lifted the lid on the trash can and heaved in all four high school yearbooks. A good rule of thumb as you minimize: get a scanner and scan paper stuff that you want to keep, even pictures. I can recall the important images, but they will have to live on in my mind's eye.

I'm still keeping up with my guys over at www.theminimalists.com and listening to their podcasts. They can be repetitive, but simple messages are like that. I benefit from the reminder of why minimalism can really add value to your life, even if the examples are similar. We surround ourselves with so much stuff and most of it is neglected, sitting in a drawer, or in a bin, or in the garage. So who needs it? Maybe someone else. Donate! 

Minimalists I admire:

Courtney Carver --  Her latest book, Soulful Simplicity.
Leo Babauta -- Leo's book, Zen Habits.

Sam Harris -- Sam's book, Waking Up.